I always know I'm sick when I lose my appetite

I

I hate that the little scratch in my throat has turned into full-fledged cold symptoms. It is 54 degrees here today and I would love to be running outside instead of drinking my lemon water. I was unsure if I should run or not yesterday, so I compromised by bringing lozenges and tissues, doing a much longer walking warm-up and interspersing running with walk recovery breaks to not overdo it. Today I'm definitely doing that whole "listen to your body" thing and will be holed up in my privy chamber with my historical fiction (Henry VIII, you royal cad, you) along with my DayQuil. Drat.

 

In yesterday's weigh-in (weigh weekly, post monthly), I was down a pound and a half and was very glad for it! I know taking a couple "sick days" from the fitness routine is not going to magically put the pounds back on, especially when combined with the (rare!) loss of appetite, but it is so frustrating to be fired up for fitness and be sidelined. Because, let's face it, getting the mojo working can be a feat as well. And I want to ride the momentum. 

 

Ah well. I know when I read others' posts about how frustrating an injury is or fears of weight relapse due to forced inactivity, I always comment (or at least think) soothing, don't-worry-this-is-a-blip-in-the-journey type thoughts. So I'm trying to force myself to be rational here.

 

There will be lots of sunny running days to come, I know.

It wasn't a perfect week

I missed a run last week. And a yoga session. Ah well. I ran 3 times (4 miles twice and a 5 mile run), did a fairly intense cardio session with all sorts of inclines and varying speeds on the treadmill (cardio attention-defecit disorder? "If I keep playing with these controls and only listen to 10 seconds of every song on my iPod, maybe I can will time to move faster..."), and went to an hour-long strength training class.

Alright I feel better now.  If I had stopped my report on what I had skipped out on last week, I would still feel like a fitness under-achiever. But by looking at the complete picture, it's decent. Not perfect. But then again, neither am I.

This reminds me that over the weekend, BF and I were hauling out trash and recycling and I wanted to dump some sketchy leftovers out before we closed up the bag. He held the bag open as I emptied out some black beans that were probably delicious in Q4 2009. As I repeatedly tapped the container against the side of the trash, he finally said, "Good enough, Virgo," and promptly tied the bag close before I could realize the satisfaction of getting that last little bean to surrender to its fate.

Yes, friends, apparently those born under my sign are known perceived to suffer from an obsession with perfection. Which is not the same as doing things perfectly, but often involves a general sense of disappointment and agonizing hours spent analyzing the gap between expectation and reality.

I like to think I am laid-back and easy-going. But when the spreadsheet says yoga and there is no yoga, then I have to edit the cell to read rest. Or abandon the spreadsheet altogether and no good can has come of that (in the past). So, yes, I owned and embraced the Rest Day(s). And I haven't turned into a giant Oreo. Yet.

I said when starting out (this time) that I really wanted to pursue a plan that I could see myself living on for the long-term. No quick fixes. No juice fasts. Even if that means a slower rate of loss. So I think I have to confront the fact that I am not always going to want to work out. Well, that's quite frequent, actually. But there will be times I will not be able to cajole, harass or otherwise motivate myself to workout. Then what? Or there will be times I'll really crave some pizza - not the healthified kind I make on whole-wheat baguettes, but the studio-apartment-sized NY slice served up on way too many corners near my home. Then what?

Then you deal. In the past, either of those instances would have lead to a whole new path of fitnesslessness and gooey foods. Why can't I instead say, "hey, sloth happens...that day off means you can really bang it out on your next run" or, "that pizza was delish...good thing you ate well the rest of the week so you could enjoy that"...or... anything positive. I want the idealized and real versions of myself to get to know each other better. I feel each could really learn from the other and together they could be an unstoppable force for good on this whole Fit Quest. 

(Self)Knowledge is power, I suppose.

Back in the 80's!

I rejiggered my sidebar to report my weight monthly here, so the next "official" post will be whatever the scale reveals on 1/26/10.  But I do weigh myself weekly and am happy to report that today, I finally dropped (more like tip-toed) down into the 80's. Woo-hoo! 

Yes, folks, that is a picture of what we used to call a record back when I was coming up.  The Jacksons!  REO Speedwagon! 

Of course I'm probably cursing myself celebrating my new low before the appointed hour, so my next post will be along the lines of Stuck in the 90's with a photo of some dark grungy Nirvana CD cover art.  No, no, I'm in the 80's, anything's possible! I can go from welder/exotic dancer to the fancy Conservatory!


I've got a workout schedule now that I'm a week or so into. Really it's what I've been doing over the past month, but a more formal version. I'm not working at the moment, so this will all need to be re-evaluated once I have to get out of bed before noon on a daily basis. 

• M- Strength training class

• T- Run (I have a mileage schedule, though still struggling with faster pace w/walk breaks vs. slower pace. Trying to just focus on completing the mileage for the day, however I do it!)

• W - Rest

• T - Run

• F - Run

• S - Yoga class

• S - Run

And trying to incorporate incidental walking throughout the week. Which is somewhat easy to do in NYC, but does require planning. (If the movie starts at 5:00 and will take 45 minutes to walk to, leaving at 4:30 equals taxi.)  Yes, this is fitness-intense, but as noted, I do have the time (if not always the mojo!) at least for now. 


I have a friend who was unemployed in the last big recession (at least in the NY area, 2002) and she still looks back fondly at the period as being her fittest ever. Which just shows it can go either way....the extra time can be filled with workouts (where I'm at currently) or the stress of the life change can leave fitness by the wayside (or weighside, where I was). 

That just reminds me how much of weight loss is in your head. The equation is so simple, but the reality is far from easy. How do you properly support yourself so that you balance pushing yourself with loving yourself? How do you pick yourself up and continue on the path after a bad weigh-in, skipped workout, pizzafest - or all of the above? I think reading blogs where the bloggers took years to lose their weight, where they captured ups and downs and plateaus and less-than-perfect choices really helps put in perspective that it's real life. 

You have to adapt and strategize constantly. It's not XYZ Diet Book with a list of Do's and Dont's. [Ominous movie preview voiceover:] This time, it's personal. What workouts do *I* enjoy? What do *I* like to eat (and drink)? What am I willing to live without? If I go overboard, how do I right the ship? I don't really know the answers to these questions, but I think asking them is a good first step.